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Showing posts from November, 2007

Years later, now

There was a boy I used to love who was always in love with somebody else who, except for a few fleeting exceptions, never loved him back. He pined after them as I pined after him. There is a decade-old picture of us and friends that I don't even need to see again to remember: he stands apart from us, wearing his tie-dyed shirt, looking at his watch. I remember this picture because we weren't on good terms that night; the camera had captured him hurting and wanting to go home. I don't remember why we weren't on good terms, as I don't remember at all any of the tiny little fires that went between us. I suspect it is because I, being in love with him the way I knew how then, blew more meaning into these tiny little fires than were worth smarting about. Ordinary love is biased, and while I was so convinced back then that what I felt for him was the most beautiful wasted thing in the world, I know now the way I loved him was ordinary. If it hadn't been, I would

Cleaning up online clutter

I'm back! For those who read this on Blogspot, you may be wondering why the reordering. Sorry it took so long. But there's a reason, and part of it is because I turned 30 and took stock of my life, and part of taking stock of my life involved some vanity searching on Google. When I really think about it, I already have too much going on. My online presence is a complete mess. Not good for obsessive-compulsive me. And I really did think about it, and I was bitten by the streamlining bug again. A little over eight hours a day, I'm in front of the computer, connected to the Internet. I have the following open all the time: (for work), MSN messenger (for work), YM (for the feeling of connectedness to the "outside world"), Yahoo for the news, and (for the daily boost of positive energy). In between lessons and lesson reports, I yield to the compulsion to check my three email accounts (two on Yahoo Mail, one on Gmail; it use