Friday, July 20, 2007

I'm a bad journal-keeper

A couple of days ago, I took out the journal I bought as 2007 rolled in. It was dusty. The last gratitude journal entry there was written in April. So much for keeping tabs about things I am grateful for. :P

Seriously speaking, though, I've been trying to live in the now. It's not always easy--but it has gotten easier ever since LEAP. And it's not like I've forgotten to be thankful for all the blessings that have been coming my way. As a matter of fact, I'm always in a space of gratitude. Hell, I skip home from work at 2 a.m., happy for another long, but wonderful day at work teaching English to ten or so Europeans!

But living in the now has made the past a little bit, well, more past. As a result, my journal-keeping (and, to a great extent, blogging) has suffered. I often feel it's pointless to write in my offline journal about my life, when my life is no longer in the past, nor in the future.

It shouldn't be the case with blogging, which I do because it's a way to keep the people who make up my small world updated, among other things. But once again, I'm feeling the urge to delete every word I've ever written, as if it will erase whatever's happened in my life. But I won't. Precisely because the past isn't my life. :)

In any case, the best remedy to this is always to stop thinking about blogging and just freaking do it.

(It's still a struggle not to be too cerebral.)