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Sa may bus stop


I wrote this on May 5, on the bus, right after it happened, and immediately posted it on Facebook. I tried to write it in English, but it was better expressed in Filipino.

Dati, tuwing hormonal ako, kung anu-anong kadramahan ang naiisip ko. Pero ngayon, at nitong mga nakalipas na buwan, ang nagpapaluha sa akin madalas yung nakikita kong pagtitiis at pagsisikap ng mga manggagawang Pilipino.

Di ako naawa ah. Nabibilib ako kadalasan. Pero minsan, nalulungkot din para sa kanila.

Nagsimula ito sa mga taxi driver na nakikita ko na natutulog sa may police station sa labas ng Eastwood. Eventually, sa pakikipagkwentuhan sa mga driver ng mga taxi na nasasakyan ko pauwi, nalaman ko na 24 hours pala yung shift nila, at kailangan talaga nila mamili ng mga lugar na kung saan pwede silang kampanteng mamahinga.

Kanina, dumaan ako sa post office sa likod ng Las PiƱas City Hall. Pagbalik ko sa bus stop, may nakita akong matandang lalaki na nakaupo sa daanan at nagtitinda ng mga pekeng alahas. Napansin ko na walang suot yung kanan niyang paa -- ginawa pala niyang upuan, pangontra, malamang, sa init ng kongkreto.

May babaeng bumibili sa kanya. Habang naguusap sila, may biglang dumating na isa pang babae, empleyado ng City Hall. "Kuya, doon ka po banda," sabi niya, sabay turo sa gilid. "Kitang-kita ka sa camera," dagdag niya, sabay turo sa CCTV. "Nakakahiya kay Mayor."

Di naman siya galit. Di naman niya pinalayas yung mama. Pinatabi niya lang. Kasi nga daw nakakahiya kay Mayor.

Dali-dali namang tumabi yung matanda. Dinala muna niya yung itim niyang bag at yung mga alahas. Tapos binalikan niya yung naiwan niyang sapatos.

Nagkatinginan kami saglit. Di rin siya galit. Ang nakita ko pa nga sa mga mata niya, page-estima sa akin kung bibili rin ba ako.

Di naman ako naawa sa kanya. Kasi buti pa nga siya, naghahanap-buhay, nagtitinda. Pero naiyak ako habang nakatayo dun sa bus stop kasi siya pa dapat yung mahiya.

Naiyak ako kasi di dapat ganun. At naiyak ako kasi ganun talaga.

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