Give me a memory I can use

On the first day of this new year, I made spaghetti with tomato and basil. While preparing the ingredients, I decided to play some music (normally I watch FRIENDS on iflix, but I had mutilated a finger that way). I had only Adele's 25 in my phone, and as I was chopping onions, "All I Ask" came on.

So there I was, with chemically-induced tears in my eyes, and the lines "Give me a memory I can use, take me by the hand while we do what lovers do. It matters how this ends ..." started playing. I was hunked over the chopping board, wiping away tears, when my brother came in.

What the hell are you crying about, he asked. He left before I could answer.

I'm suddenly recalling this memory, over a week later, because I'm making the same pasta dish right now. And I'm also thinking "... what if I never love again?"