'Something beautiful is going to happen'

Something beautiful is going to happen, the priest said at mass yesterday. And like Peter, he added, you will say, 'It is good that we are here.'

The priest then told everyone: Hang on; these are sad times, but something beautiful is going to happen. 

I wanted to cry. And I may have a little. 

I didn't know that the readings during Lent are designed to lead one to conversion in preparation for Easter. I don't know what I thought of how the readings are organized for the year. I probably never thought of it at all. 

But reading after reading, since Ash Wednesday mass, and now I think I feel a hand reaching out for mine.

***

Truth be told, I am not yet at the point where I go to mass and say, "It is good that I am here." Sometimes I still feel doubt and boredom and even annoyance. These days, I've also felt some resistance.

But I did say I'll do my best to observe Lent, so I still went to mass and still prayed for things. And then, not knowing what else to say, I just said to God, "Help me; I'm sorry."

A couple of weeks more to go. I'm hanging on. I'd like to believe that something beautiful is going to happen at the end of this.